Seems my life is going to change
I close my eyes, begin to pray
Then tears of joy stream down my face
-Creed, Arms Wide Open
It's not exactly as if I just realized I'm going to have a 3rd kid, as the song lyric would imply. But it's what's been running through my head for the last 3 days, so I'm going with it. It's better than "I just can't wait to be king" which is what my darling son has been singing incessantly since we watched the Lion King on New Year's Eve. Not sure what he's trying to tell me with that one.
So what has changed? THE date. You know, the date that Baby Girl is going to make her big entrance into the world. I remember when I was pregnant with the boys that I would finish up every workday by cleaning off my desk and making sure that I didn't leave anything in a state of halfway-doneness. (Confession time - most of the time, most of my projects at home and at work are in some various state of halfway-doneness. Those who have seen the inside of my house should try to contain their shock and awe.)
This time? We know a date. A very set, definitive, choose your baby's birthday kind of date. Well, if I was really choosing her birthday, she'd have been born in October when the weather was nice. But I did at least get to semi-choose within the 37 week block the doctors approved, and I got to choose my fave doc while I was at it. And the date is?
Wednesday January 8, 2014.
Yes, people. Next Wednesday. As in, 5 days from now. THAT soon. Less than one week from today. (I am repeating this concept for my own benefit - I believe that you, my incredibly intelligent and competent readers are getting the idea. I, however, am definitely still in denial.)
I was totally counting on her being late and arriving in February, but I was totally wrong. And now I'm totally behaving like a chicken with its head cut off, running around saying things like "But I have not packed my hospital bag yet!" and "But her room's not even close to ready yet!" and "But we do not have a middle name yet!" Literary types, please note the repetitive nature of "But___Not___Yet!!" I have lived in the but not yet phase for several weeks, totally in denial that this is happening.
The docs kept promising to check one more time in the hopes that things would change and I could go into labor on my own. Yesterday was the last of those checks. Nothing has changed since 18 weeks, so c-section is the way this wee one will arrive, and early is going to be the timing. It wasn't my plan, but I've heard the phrase "life threatening bleeding risk" enough times in recent weeks that I've come around on the idea. Bleeding to death during childbirth is definitely not on my life's To Do list.
So, one last belly shot (bwahaha - that would imply that there have been other belly pics on the ole blog, and I think we can all agree that my posting schedule has gone from weekly to monthly to something more like bi-annually):
Poor Guacamole. Third child problems - my pregnancy with this little one has not been documented and detailed like it was with the first two. And I probably won't end up with over a thousand pictures of her first week of life like I did with Jay. (I am not making this up - we have >1000 pics of him from ONE SINGLE WEEK. I mean, it was a big week, but that's a little much, even for me.)
For comparison, similarly timed belly shots from all 3 kids:
Who looks biggest to you? I really think that my belly looks bigger this time around - or at least it sticks more straight out. But I'm actually measuring pretty small this time around, and when she's born at 37 weeks, she will probably be ~5-6 lbs. That's a far cry from the 10 pound mammoth baby you see growing on the left.
And just for good measure, I'll throw in what is my fave pic of me and the boys (and girl!) ever, taken in mid-November. Huge thanks to Liz Hunter Photography for the most fun, laid back photo session. There was headbutting, leaf throwing, rolling around on the ground, and lots of laughing. Plus the occasional tear, but that was to be expected when there's headbutting involved.
And yes, I did notice that I am wearing essentially the same thing in these pics. That gray cardigan has been my uniform this time around. I do have some cute maternity clothes, but I am all about comfort at this point. Sigh. Comfortable clothes, and Tums.
Seriously, I am trying to not wish away these last 5 days. I feel quite certain that our family is complete, and these 5 days are the last days I will ever be pregnant. Given my heartburn + swollen legs + general pregnancy-induced misery this time around, I kinda want to shout "Hallelujah it's almost over!" At the same time, I do love those little kicks and I know what a blessing it has been to carry all 3 of my babies. And in some ways, I don't want that to end.
So that's what's new in my world. Still trying to wrap my brain around the fact that by this time next week, I will be holding my dear daughter in my arms. Now, remind me - what *do* I need in a hospital bag, anyway?