...on my big green tractor
We can go slow or make it go faster
Down through the woods and out to the pasture
Long as I'm with you, it really don't matter...
-Jason Aldean, "Big Green Tractor"
When I was a kid, I hated running errands with my mom. Hated with a passion. "Running errands" could mean anything from going to the bank (where I'd inevitably get a lollipop) to going to KMart and Old America (anyone else remember that store? It was a kind of a precursor to Michael's). These weren't exactly horrible places to go, but just the phrase "running errands" was enough to send me running into the woods to hide.
However, one of the highlights of running errands with mom was the knowledge that if a trip to KMart was involved, I'd get to ride the merry-go-round. Rides at the fair had nothing on this little carousel - it was red and it had 4 little plastic horses. For a mere 25 cents, you could ride around in circles, very small circles, for approximately 12 seconds. But boy did I look forward to it.
A little while back, I was dragging Jay around for a variety of errands, and for some reason we ended up at KMart. I couldn't resist. He was underwhelmed.
How is his head touching the top? He's only three!
Want to know why he's underwhelmed by 12 seconds of riding the KMart merry-go-round? Why doesn't the excitement of this motivate him to behave during errands?
Because his daddy uses this as the good behavior bribe:
Oh yeah. Arrrrgggg. Growwwwl. (insert additional manly noises here) Who needs to waste a quarter on the tiny carousel when you've got the lawnmowers at Home Depot & Lowes?