There's room enough for two
Up on the roof (up on the roof).
--The Drifters, "Up on the Roof"
So through this ordeal, Jen and I have often wondered what Jay's view of it was. He made it pretty clear the last couple weeks how he felt about things. Playroom? Good. Hot dogs? Great. Medicine? Only if I have to. Phlebotomists? Not them again! In other words, he returned to being a pretty normal two year old who had spent way too much time in the hospital.
What we really wondered was if he had any recollection of his arrest, being on ECMO, and being on the ventilator. We were pretty sure he wouldn't since he was getting enough morphine and midazolam every 4 hours to lay me out for days. But we still wondered did he dream, did he see the bright light at the end of the tunnel, or did he talk about tools with his namesake Pappaw Jay and his Papa Perry?
At one point in the hospital, we were discussing that he had been asleep for a long time. We asked if he had any dreams. He didn't really have much too say, and certainly didn't shed any light on it for us. So we let it go.
Fast forward to this weekend. We were saying our prayers before bed which usually consist of Jay thanking God for "all my people" and for whatever random object he spies next ("Thank you God for my bed, thank you for the ceiling." You get the idea). After his prayer on Friday night, he asked me, "Where does God live?"
"Uhh...he's kind of...everywhere" was the best I could do on short notice. Thinking quickly to something we learned from our favorite children's minister LL, I asked him, "Where do you think God lives?"
He replied with the less theological, but much more obvious answer, "At his house." Then I got, "Daddy, where is God's house?" I considered the sky or heaven, but went with "Church," which seemed to be in line with where he was going. Next up on the wheel of two year old theological questions was, "Can I go see God?" I was thinking, "Jay you have come closer to shaking his hand than you may ever know," but I figured I shouldn't go there, so I said (ambiguously), "Yeah, someday."
You know where my mind was going, so I had to ask, "Have you ever seen God before?" Surprisingly, he responded, "Yeah." Intrigued, I asked, "Where?"
Wait for it.
Any preachers out there, this is going to be your next sermon.
You know from the mouths of babes, and all that.
"On our roof!" He got really excited and then added, "I helped him down, and he gave me a big hug!" Either he's got a great imagination and doesn't remember anything about the time he was unconscious or it really was a lot of fun hanging out with God Almighty "Up on the Roof." Either way, I'll sleep better at night.